birthday blahs

I've been having a hard time with Tiny's birthday quickly approaching. All I can think about is her Mom and what she must be feeling with her daughter's 1st birthday so close. I also can't stop thinking about what this time last year was like for her. Was she uncomfortable? Was she scared? Was she alone? Who was with her? Who was taking care of her? Did she know that she wouldn't be raising her daughter? All of these questions I can't shake. The thing is, I don't really want to shake them. I just want to know the answers.
I've mentioned my "blah-ness" to a handful of people (who aren't adoptive parents) and I get the same response. "Oh, you'll forget about this." "You'll forget about her and move on." "Would you even want to maintain contact?" "Wouldn't that be confusing for your daughter?" "What if your daughter doesn't want to maintain contact with her?" Aaaaarrrrggghhh!!! I just want to scream!!!
I know that this stupid change with the US Consulars Office (read this for more explanation-D does a much better job at it than I could ever do) is making things worse for me this week. If I knew that I could just jot down a quick little note on how wonderful our daughter is doing and what a joy she is and here are some photos from her party, look at all of the people that love her so much and pop it in the mail, maybe this week would be easier for me.
Don't worry those of you who will be at her party-I will be happy, I will be very happy! How could I not? My baby is turning the big 0-1, but my heart may be a little heavy that day.

Oh, I am so going out for a martini tonight.

barf!

There is nothing worse than a dog puking in your bed at 3am. Trust me.

HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY!!!

We celebrated St. Patrick's Day with Ethiopian food for lunch and corned beef n' cabbage for dinner....it was a yummy day but I am dreading tomorrow's diaper ;(

Tiny's Top 10

Tiny has been tagged by Makena!!!

Here goes (in no particular order)......

10. Favorite game is peek-a-boo. I especially like it if you hide behind something and peek around it. I think that is absolutely hilarious and I will crawl very quickly after you, squealing!!

9. I really like cheese. Any kind is fine with me. Cheese and turkey is even better but make sure it is the good organic slices (read: expensive) and not the slimy kind that you find at Jewel.

8. I don't particularly like to ride in the stroller anymore. I know that this drives my mom nuts.

7. I enjoy pulling books off of the shelf. I really like Fight Club and it is always the first one I grab.

6. I will dance to anything. Commercials on TV, cell phone ring tones, etc.

5. My middle name means patience but I really don't have any. I am becoming really good at "The Tantrum" or "Melting" as my mom calls it, and I have a flair for the dramatic.

4. I love to give kisses but only to mom, dad & the puppies. Sometimes I "accidentally" bite!

3. I have a great sense of humor and a great laugh to match ;)

2. My parents have a million nicknames for me! My mom calls me "cheesy mac" & "toothy mactooth" and I really don't know why.

1. I have a love/hate relationship with the Dyson. I love to look at it. I love to talk to it. I even love to chase it BUT if it comes anywhere near me I scream & skedaddle!

*I tag the following: Aiden D, Charlie F, Micah Y (when he's feeling better!), & Zinabu

Walking!!?? Already??

Nora took her first steps today-4 of them to be exact!!!

The 1st one was this morning-she let go of the bed frame, took 1 step towards me and fell flat on her face. Then this afternoon, it was the same scenario but I was sitting closer. She took 3 super fast shuffling steps towards me and fell into my lap!! Wow, I can't believe she is almost walking! Where has the time gone???

Hmm...in light of her birthday coming up next week, lets recap her accomplishments!

• she cruises everywhere and is now taking steps on her own
• she can stand without holding onto something until she realizes that she isn't holding on anymore, which at that point she falls :)
• she says Mama, Dada, Dot, No & Wow. She also says something that sounds like Touchdown, and holds her arms above her head.
• She can clap on command and if she sees someone snapping their fingers she will try to snap hers.
• She loves to dance! If you tell her to shake her butt, she will. She can also head bang like an ol' heavy metal pro! Slayer is one of her favorites (yeah, we don't listen to kid music in this house)
• She now has 3 teeth and I think a 4th is on it's way
• She loves to feed people, but watch out! She also tries to take whatever bite she gave you back!
• She can wave and blow kisses :)

Everyday is something new & exciting with this kid! I love it!

Goofing around